it is easier to love when you are loved

In "The Doula Book" and in "Birthing Within", a study was cited that took place in Johannesburg, South Africa.  They took 189 women having their first babies, and assigned doulas to half of them.  These doulas were to "remain with the laboring women constantly and use touch and verbal communication to focus on comfort, reassurance, and praise." The purpose was to study the long-term effects a doula has on the first several weeks after the birth of a baby.  Their findings were amazing.

To quote from "The Doula Book":

"Fewer doula-supported mothers considered the labor and delivery to have been difficult, fewer thought it was much worse than they imagined, and more believed they had coped well during this experience.  When the mothers were asked about their experiences with their babies, the doula-group mothers spent less time away from their infants.  These results suggest that doula support during labor has effects similar to those of mother-infant contact directly after delivery; both appear to increase the mother's interest in her baby and her interaction with the newborn."

Here is a graph I pieced together from numbers found in "The Doula Book":

Johannesburg Study
	CONTROL GROUP	WITH DOULA SUPPORT
Feeding Behavior at Six Weeks
Breast-feeding only	29%	51%
Demand feeding	47%	81%
Feeding food other than milk	53 %	18%
Feeding problem	63%	16%
Average number of days breast-feeding only	24 days	32 days
Infant Health Problems at Six Weeks
Vomiting	28%	4%
Cold or runny nose	69%	39%
Cough	64%	39%
Poor appetite	25%	0%
Diarrhea	33%	19%
Maternal Outcome at Six Weeks
Mother brought baby to postnatal visit	47%	64%
Mother always picks up baby when crying	40%	80%
Hours away from baby/week	6.6	1.7
Emotional State of Mothers at Six Weeks
Reported anxiety	40%	28%
Reported high self-esteem	59%	74%
Reported depression	23%	10%
Satisfaction with Partner
Before pregnancy	63%	65%
During pregnancy	48%	49%
Since the baby was born	49%	85%
Reported their relationship being better right after the birth	30%	71%
Maternal Perceptions at Six Weeks
Perception of baby
Cries less than others	17%	55%
Special	71%	91%
Easy to manage	27%	65%
Clever	47%	78%
Beautiful	67%	89%
Regards baby as a separate, sociable person by 6 weeks	80%	100%
Perception of self
Feels close to baby	80%	97%
Pleased to have baby	65%	97%
Managing well	65%	91%
Communicates well	68%	91%
Becoming a mother was easy	11%	45%
Can look after the baby better than anyone else	31%	72%

The differences here really are amazing.  If you are able to find a doula that you connect with, please use their trained services. 

But most importantly, make sure you surround yourself with people at your birth who will be supportive, loving, positive, and completely on your side.  Find a doctor you agree with.  Ask if you can trade nurses if the ones assigned to you aren't fitting.  Talk with your husband about the hopes the two of you have for this experience.  And find an experienced mother or doula to help the two of you bring about those hopes. 

Our thoughts and emotions are tied to our health just as much as the food we put inside our bodies.